Friends and Casseroles

My twin 14 year old boys have been on Facebook for the last year (a contentious decision for many I know, but I caved…what can I say?) So I joined the game too. And I’m proud to say I’ve collected a reasonable number of friends…north of 100 but shy of 200. Not bad.

However, within a matter of weeks, my sons lapped me. I pulled up the computer the other day and was greeted with one of their Facebook pages. But before I could dig for the dirt, I noticed a friend of his on the page…repeatedly. There must have been about 200 “Happy Birthday!” wishes from almost every child I’d ever seen in my kids’ school. I shut it down, thinking about the fact that I had never had so many friends wish me Happy Birthday if you added all my Birthdays up!

My contemplation was interrupted by my friend Mary Ann at the door bearing a warm casserole, salad, bread and homemade lemon meringue pie. I’ve had a tough time of it lately and she had emailed out of the blue and offered to bring a warm meal. I took her up on it.

Which got me to thinking about all the hundreds of birthday wishes. What is the value of a friend? Is it better to have more? Are you out of line if you don’t friend everyone you know, from your boss to your ex to your gynecologist? If I was arrested in the middle of the night, would I ask for one “post “rather than one call? None of my hundreds of virtual friends ever brought me a warm dinner.

I suppose both routes to friends serve their purpose, but...If you’re going to be “friends” with hundreds of people, make sure you know the difference between a virtual friend and one who shows up in person with a warm cassarole on a cold night.

I’m still on Facebook, and I still add friends. But I’m sure going not going to write a handwritten note to all 197 of them thanking them for dinner. Gotta find the stationery. Ciao.

Jules